mardi 29 juin 2010

confessions of a dope fiend pain patient

i've been running too long
on cigarette smoke and pills
i've been cruising on crises
not even my own
i don't know when to stop or let go
like a fast train my mind
clips the mountain's edge
and then runs right over it

my teeth are all broken
my legs are immobile
yet i don't know my angst level
can't feel my own gains or losses
i say i want to be there for you
fix me fix you fix everything
but i'm already sleeping when
it's time to press the enter key

it's too hard to be human
it's easier to be figurative
it's damn easy to find a cause
when you're running away from yourself
when there's nothing left but
time and cigarettes and you're rich
what else could you need
but a decent night's sleep

i used to think i was a genius
pat myself on the back for it
like it was my birthday every day
the wise men found a star
and followed it to a barn
but i've lost my pathfinders
lost them to the zen
of a three times daily five-alarm fury

i'm ready to make a change
i've been saying that for 14 years
i'll sweat it out vomit hallucinate
whatever it takes because
i'm dying from it i know it
'cause i'm a genius 
my mother told me
just before she went out the door

and i got a father too ain't lyin'
hired a spy to find me in 1993
although he forgets about '79
when i called him the first time
and he said "sorry just can't
'cause my dad and i had our glass
shook our hands and
that was that"

i didn't understand it then
told him i understood it now
but even then he couldn't cop to it
i guess we're all just cowards
all of us geniuses who
stick out like wankers
with our winsome mannerisms
and our tunnel visions

i'll close with this:
each bloody war we're fighting is illegal
and i'm damn sorry i missed your call
i'll always try to be there for you
but now is the time for
all good men to turn inward
where we hope for a cash cow
and an easy detoxification

dimanche 27 juin 2010

samedi 26 juin 2010

Dominique A - Immortels (écrit pour Bashung)

"Le centre de gravité est disparu..." ~Dominique A

Je ne t'ai jamais dit 
I never told you
Mais nous sommes immortels
But we are immortal
Pourquoi es tu parti
Why did you leave
Avant que je te l'apprenne
Before I understood you

Le savais tu déjà 
Did you know it already
Avais tu deviné
Had you guessed
Que des dieux se cachaient
That the gods hide themselves
Sous nos faces abîmées
Under our damaged faces

Tous les baisers reçus
All the kisses received
Savais tu qu'ils duraient
Did you know they would endure
Qu'en se mordant la bouche
That in biting the lip
Le gout en revenait
The taste came back

Et qu'il y avait du sang 
That there was blood
Qui ne sècherait pas
That would not dry
Tu me donnais la main
You gave me your hand
Pour boire de ce sang là
To drink of that blood

Je ne t'ai jamais dit
I never told you
Mais nous sommes immortels
But we are immortal
Immortels, immortels
Immortal, immortal

As tu pensé parfois
Did you sometimes think
Que rien ne finirait
That nothing would finish
Et qu'on soit là ou pas
And that one is there or not
Quand même on y serait
Even when one was there

Et toi qui n'est plus là 
And you who are no longer here
C'est comme si tu étais
It is as if you were
Plus immortel que moi
More immortal than I
Mais je te suis de près
But I am following close behind you

Je ne t'ai jamais dit
I never told you
Mais nous sommes 
But we are immortal
Immortels, immortels
Immortal, immortal 

jeudi 24 juin 2010

Paris - Marche de Fierté 2010

Samedi, 26 juin 2010, à 14h, de Montparnasse à Bastille (Click to enlarge). Un grand salut à mon ami Alain et l'equipe Zelink: Have a great time! xoxoxoxoxoxo

dimanche 20 juin 2010

I. dreaming graces

Picasso's The Three Graces

the three graces are waking me up
i am touched, molded, kissed
by their dextrous fingers
my eyes, hands and feet are washed
my energy enfolded in broadcloth
pleated from left to right
and then firmly tucked at my waist
the thick pallu thrown at my shoulder

i approach a mirror descended
from the summit of mount olympus
i am not the same woman, invaded by
such joie de vivre, la fête et la splendour
that i have grown a third body
in the center of my breast, ruby-like
whose facets reflect infinite rivulets
in whose mouth flows oceans

the water bears infinite stars that
live and die in a song, a creation story
about a ravaged girl left to die
until small birds found her and
carried her heavy body across the wire
with virgil by her side she descended
the nine levels of hell and then sleeping
she opened the seven gates of heaven

II. waking furies

La Marquise Casati par Man Ray (1922)

the furies are freedom burning within
they make life cold and indefinite

on the banks of the river seine
widows come to make their devotions

gloveless and ringless
children oft call them witches

they bring foxglove and rosehips
to foster vengeful goddesses

when headless widows talk
they spawn public discontent

tell windless tales of corrupt governments
and murdered offspring

of roman rule end of empires
the rape of Persephone

how men rose to be like gods
on the backs of despondant women

widows wander backstreets and alleys
until the bones break in their feet

then they sit and wait for death
as passerbys look beyond them

eating from garbage cans bathing in gutters
they damn themselves to freedom

vendredi 18 juin 2010

From the diary of a waitress

I told him I spit in his soup.
He didn't complain;
he wasn't hungry anyway.

~lt, 1975

mardi 8 juin 2010

New WHAT ABOUT ME trailer

i'm very sick right now and haven't been writing much. and that's what hurts the most! love to my friends with me-cfs... i hope we get our lives back one day soon.