rehearsing

i had an insight
but just for a minute
and then it was spent
like every red cent
i lay my hands on

money comes and
money goes
like self-revelations
during early morning
anxiety attacks

you wake from 
the dream again
wanting to make
amends to everyone
you've harmed

you work out a
plan in your head
write a letter
pick up the phone
dial the number

and just before
they pick up
you get out of bed
and forget everything 
best laid plans

next month
i will make a budget
next month
i will speak with you
i'm rehearsing it